My little girl who is now 10 was on my lap cuddling with me last night and commented how she would like to be able to be with me all the time and wouldn’t it be nice if she could just morph into me sometimes so we could be together always. It was a very nice, warm fuzzy mommy-daughter moment.

As I enjoyed the moment, knowing that she is growing up way to fast - I also remembered she only weights 58.5 lbs. And then I thought so far I’ve lost 64.5 lbs of the 153.5 lbs. I want to lose. Realizing that I had lost more weight then what my daughter weighs was a bit startling as well as a boost to my motivation — because with her on my lap I could really grasp just how much weight that is. Sure I still have a long road ahead (89 lbs to go) — but visualizing how much easier life will be and how much more energy and better I will feel by getting all that weight off is also a big motivator. I can’t even pick my daughter up any more, but here I am still carrying around more weight then what she weights - that has to be exhausting, and making my whole entire body work harder and straining all my joints.

Sure mentally I “know” all this - but on a day in and day out basis, one day blends into the other, and a l lb here and l lb there feels the same. Also sometimes it’s difficult to appreciate what you have accomplished when you have so much to do ahead of you, and each week seems like a huge struggle to try and get the scale to budge even the slightest little bit and there isn’t any major changes happening because it is such a slow process.

When you have a lot of weight to lose there isn’t much change in the mirror for a long time to give you a lot of positive reinforcement. I am still wearing the same clothes (a bit looser fitting now, but I’m not buying any new clothes for a long time) so there isn’t much positive feedback from that either. But having visual, concrete evidence of what about 60 lbs really “feels” like was an unexpected motivation boost for me because in brought into perspective that all those small victories each week, all those tiny positive steps towards my goal weight do add up to big changes and better health.

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